I have declared Sunday an authentic day of Sabbath rest for myself. I am on a roll of working an absurd number of hours, which I tend to do this time of year. Last year, I worked nonstop for weeks and weeks without a day off, and at the end of it all, I cried a lot and yelled at people. I had on this itchy sweatshirt that was covered in dog hair, and my hair was greasy and pulled back in a ponytail. I was uncomfortable, exhausted, and had a constant headache.

This year’s experiment with being overworked includes a…

“It is confusing to be in relationships and not know where we stand… We have a right to be direct about how we define the relationship — what we want it to be. But relationships equal two people who have equal rights. The other person needs to be able to define the relationship to. We have a right to know, and ask. So do they. Honesty is the best policy…
“Information is a powerful tool, and having the information about what a particular relationship is — the boundaries and definitions of it — will empower us to take care of ourselves…

We’re in an RV park just outside of Yosemite. The kids get into little screamy fights a few times a day because of the close quarters, (James says, “I just need my personal space!”) but other than that we’re having a great time. I’m still struggling, as I wrote in my last post. I spoke to my wife just a little bit ago, so that she knows what’s going on, and I’m hoping if I keep doing the right things I can turn around.

Turn around is exactly the right phrase. The problem isn’t as much what I’m doing, as where…

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change.

Diane is driving me mad. I cannot change Diane. Under a sheen of civility, her attitude is increasingly negative and adversarial. I know that on an even deeper level, she is motivated by fear. Fear that she’ll look like an incompetent mother when her adult children make poor decisions.  Fear of our church changing around her.  Fear of the world changing around her. Even though I’m a bridge-builder, a deliberate friend to Diane and her family and her children, I’m still a threat, because I’m the guy who understands computers.…

Last night, I listened to a parent talk about anxiety. This wasn’t your usual garden-variety form of hand wringing but a gut-wrenching anxiety that hits in the night and lasts until dawn. The question to the group was “What do you do to alleviate anxiety?” I thought back to those many nights that I would lie awake worrying about my work and the things that I had to do, worrying about my SO and what was going to happen to us, and worrying about my mother who had severe depression. Sometimes I would eventually fall asleep but mostly I would…