Hey Murph,

I just spent a wonderful afternoon celebrating my dear friend’s birthday.  A small group of women gathered at her home, in the middle of The Blue Ridge  Mountains - at 59 I was the youngest.  This was not your typical group of “mature women .”  One of them, previously an IBM Executive’s wife, now speaks to dragons, reads crystals, and follows many Native American practices and spirituality.  One of them is a reflexologist who always must consult “spirit” before she does anything, is completely organic,  is a walking encyclopedia on anything that comes from the earth, and a couple of the women use astrology and numerology to help determine their courses of action.  These very strong women gathered on the front lawn of my friend’s home and spent an hour blowing bubbles, jumping rope, spinning hula hoops and making whirling noises from some plastic tube that had been purchased at the dollar store!  We had a ball! Although we usually play in different sandboxes, today we all shared our sand and made one giant playground where everyone was welcome and all were comfortable just being who they were.

We ate hamburgers stuffed with Gorgonzola Cheese - both of which had been organically grown, salad that contained everything from dried cranberries to walnuts and homemade potato salad with all natural ingredients, of course.  The birthday cake was made with some kind of organic flour and although it did contain some butter, the cook used Stevia (an organic sweetener) instead of sugar. But also on the table were two containers of Ben & Jerry’s ice cream!

But there was one thing that was missing - alcohol.  All the women present drank water, tonic, decaf coffee and tea.  Some of us smoked, some sat on the porch and just enjoyed the view of the mountains.  Others walked around the gorgeous surroundings and just stopped to smell the roses. It was a spontaneous, delightful gathering of strangers and friends to celebrate the birthday of someone dear to us all.

Eleanor, the birthday girl, has been my rock for 10 years and when others judged and  scorned my behavior when I was in active addiction, she accepted with unconditional love,  just who I was at any given time.  And to this day I know that I am totally loved - no questions asked - no judgment - ever.

I’ve lived years of total chaos, years when I wanted to be someone I didn’t even know…..where I ran and ran - not even knowing where I was going - just had to keep moving.  Everything was done in the extreme - drinking, drugging, work, play - it didn’t matter.  I was on overdrive all the time and never thought about reaching for the emergency break - until one day it hit me right in the head.   I’m a slow learner, but the longer I stay sober, the more I know what is important and what is not.  And spending the afternoon with a bunch of wild, crazy, wonderful, spiritual, strong women beats another drunkalogue where I know I had fun but can’t for the life of me remember any of it anyway.  Reality is pretty damn cool, Murph.  Thanks for helping me remember that.

I love you, M -

Till Next Time

Your Humble Road Warrior