Creative Commons, photo by Robert Couse-Baker

“Wise folks count their blessings
Fools count their problems”

On Monday I reactivated my status as a vehicle owner. Ok, that sounds boring, sure. For me this is a HUGE deal. I haven’t owned a 2 axle, 4 wheel vehicle since 1998. 11 years.  My thoughts were that it was inefficient to own one, and eventually, it became inefficient not to own one.

Monday morning blogger Kristin H. sold me her super fantastic minivan. Monday afternoon found me homeward bound, a five hour road trip. Clear blue skies and curvy mountain roads opened up before me, giving me time to contemplate and listen to music. A few orange, red and yellow leaves clung stubbornly to the trees and the day was just beautiful.

Many thoughts have been furrowing my brow lately. The past week it has been hard to laugh, hard to feel.

My ears caught this line in a song:

“Wise folks count their blessings
Fools count their problems”

I laughed, I smiled and presto, my whole attitude shifted. I told myself, “I know that”.
How easy it is sometimes to forget what we frigging know; to shun the tools we’ve curated for our recovery.

You know that feeling when you are dreaming deeply and your ears catch sound of a pesky alarm clock? You can literally feel yourself being pulled away from a deep, dreamy slumber and back into this world.

Sometimes when I’m in my funk, coming back around to a good attitude mirrors that feeling. It’s like a quagmire and I can’t get release. The harder I struggle, or the more I panic, the deeper I sink. Thing about this that I hate, is it’s just me holding myself captive!!!!

I’m a fan of the Gratitude List. I have a lot blessing to count. And, heck, a lot of problems can actually turn into blessings.

1. My new minivan is going to save me a lot of time (groceries, laundry, errands) and give some independence because I don’t have to keep bugging friends to use their car when I’m on a video assignment.
2.  I listen to good music
3.  I work for a recovery site that has big ideas, a pure heart, and is gaining momentum.
4.  I am loved, sweetly and supportively, by many good people.
5.  School is teaching me stuff that rocks my world. I’m learning how to use technology to produce my artistic visions.
6.  The vanity plate I wanted was available.
7.  My family is starting (after 5 years) to be financially supportive and involved in my education. Thank God.
8.  I don’t use anger, hatred, and judgement to express my emotions.
9.  I don’t manipulate the truth to justify my actions. I can be honest, even if I am to fault.
10. I’m not attached to others seeing the Truth. If I can help, fine. If not, I won’t hurt myself trying to reach out.
11. I don’t take it personally anymore.

Link to YouTube video of song.