Do Not Go Gentle.
Dec 28, 08- (by JunkysWife)
- 4 responses
- Sober Salon
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A friend of mine said recently that loving an addict is something like that movie Awakenings, where the catatonic people wake up for a bit and come back to themselves, but then slowly fade away again. The metaphor fit for my husband as well.
The last several weeks, he’s been back to himself. I’m afraid of losing him, so every time he says something shitty or does something addicty, I feel my insides clench. Yesterday morning, we were shopping together, and I was having trouble finding the store we were looking for. When he became upset with me, I was sure that his adventure in recovery was over, and that it was all backsliding and spiraling and misery. It made me sad, and afraid.
I thought of the Dylan Thomas villanelle, and I wanted to read it to him. Instead, I’ll link you to it.
I hope he doesn’t go easy. I hope he keeps up the fight.
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The slow fade is horrible to watch. You start questioning every look, what they are eating (or not eating), mentally counting the money. He really went through a lot this time, hopefully the memory is fresh and will help him stay sober.
Thank you so so much for this reflection! It really is beautiful and brings more light to the dark spaces… Even those of us who have addiction issues struggle with other loved ones who do as well, and we cannot see as clearly.
Oh so many messages today that are of great help!
Thanks again!!!
My prayer is for your husband to continue to seek and see his Spiritual Connection and for God to show himself to both you and your husband so frequently that the rainbow of the Spirit can do nothing but shine for you both in so many facets of your lives that you are covered in Light!
Wow - I never thought of it that way before, but I totally get that!