THE LOST YEARS: Surviving a Mother and Daughter’s Worst Nightmare

By Kristine Wandzilak and Constance Curry

Reviewed by Ginger B.

I am not a teen-age girl whose life has become completely devastated by addiction, nor am I a mother whose teen-age child became addicted to drugs and almost died. I am, however, a grown-up woman who became addicted to drugs and alcohol in my twenties and whose life was slowly demolished during the course of my use over the next twenty years, and this book spoke loud and clear to me.
“The Lost Years” is written in a kind of “mother-daughter” dialogue format. Kristina describes an event or situation in her life and then her mother describes her version of the same circumstance, thereby creating two sometimes similar, sometimes opposing views on the ruination not only of a young girl, but on her siblings, parents and entire family as well.
Kristina opens the book by describing her first drink at the age of 13, when her parents were having one of their many parties. The second of four children in an affluent household, Kristine recounts in a raw honesty, how she plunged into a life of burglary, prostitution and devastating rape until she found herself dying on the floor of a homeless shelter 8 years later.
Constance echoes each of Kristina’s versions with her own torment as a mother, trying to maintain some semblance of normalcy for her other two children, while being emotionally lacerated by her degrading enslavement to trying to save her daughter. Finding Al-Anon, Constance is finally able to break the cycle of co-dependency by turning Kristina out to the streets in order to save herself and her other children.
I must admit that when I first read the book, not having the insight of the mother of an addicted child and not having gone through the same kind of deterioration that Kristina experienced (though my own disintegration was accompanied by its own version of agony), I was one step removed from identifying completely with the situation. But I recently viewed several clips of Kristina and her mom talking in various interviews and I came away with a new appreciation of the mother-daughter bond and how these two amazing women went through hell and back again to emerge as whole human beings.

Kristina is an internationally recognized interventionist and has honed her skills to helping adolescents and young adults recover from the ravages of drugs and alcohol and Connie is a fund raiser and speaker for those still suffering needlessly.

If you are a teen-ager or young adult who is caught in the net of addiction, or, if you are one of their parents or family members, this book is an absolutely indispensable read. If you are not, this book will enlighten you as to the power of addiction and also the power of a mother’s love.

Check out a short clip of both mother and daughter at a Book signing…

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