Comments on: Fun in Chicago . . . http://www.thesecondroad.org/bouncing_off_the_bottom/2008/05/27/fun-in-chicago/ Twelve Steps to a Real Life and a Pretty Good Time. Thu, 20 Nov 2008 23:18:46 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.5.1 By: Lydia http://www.thesecondroad.org/bouncing_off_the_bottom/2008/05/27/fun-in-chicago/#comment-3965 Lydia Mon, 09 Jun 2008 09:52:58 +0000 http://www.thesecondroad.org/bouncing_off_the_bottom/2008/05/27/fun-in-chicago/#comment-3965 Really relate to this. I'm 57, a fact that I just admitted to the world in my blog profile in February. It felt great to stop beating around the bush about my age. I have the same impression as you concerning the women on The View. Barbara Walters depresses me more than she interests me now and that's not how I want to feel about her. When I was in alcohol treatment almost 23 years ago one of the staff told me that I was lucky that my years of drinking hadn't ruined my looks. I was there fighting for my life and she got me off-track in my thinking for about a day. She meant well, but my god, is there no place to escape being judged on how good/young we look? Really relate to this. I’m 57, a fact that I just admitted to the world in my blog profile in February. It felt great to stop beating around the bush about my age. I have the same impression as you concerning the women on The View. Barbara Walters depresses me more than she interests me now and that’s not how I want to feel about her.

When I was in alcohol treatment almost 23 years ago one of the staff told me that I was lucky that my years of drinking hadn’t ruined my looks. I was there fighting for my life and she got me off-track in my thinking for about a day. She meant well, but my god, is there no place to escape being judged on how good/young we look?

]]> By: Bill Webb http://www.thesecondroad.org/bouncing_off_the_bottom/2008/05/27/fun-in-chicago/#comment-3958 Bill Webb Tue, 03 Jun 2008 19:02:35 +0000 http://www.thesecondroad.org/bouncing_off_the_bottom/2008/05/27/fun-in-chicago/#comment-3958 I can so relate! My wife and I lost several cats all at once, due to an eviction many years ago, unable/unequipped to make the necessary arrangements, some were left to go feral and some went to the pound. Four survived. One left us at fifteen years after the kind of care you describe -- she was suffering and we had to let her go. Her housemate, Mr. Slim, put his paw in my hand and breathed his last one month short of his 20th birthday. He was my drinking buddy -- the one that curled up on my lap when I was in my reclined getting really loaded. I always felt as though his regard for me was sort of an absolution for the way I unintentionally treated the others. I have to stop writing now... I can so relate! My wife and I lost several cats all at once, due to an eviction many years ago, unable/unequipped to make the necessary arrangements, some were left to go feral and some went to the pound.

Four survived. One left us at fifteen years after the kind of care you describe — she was suffering and we had to let her go. Her housemate, Mr. Slim, put his paw in my hand and breathed his last one month short of his 20th birthday. He was my drinking buddy — the one that curled up on my lap when I was in my reclined getting really loaded. I always felt as though his regard for me was sort of an absolution for the way I unintentionally treated the others.

I have to stop writing now…

]]> By: pat http://www.thesecondroad.org/bouncing_off_the_bottom/2008/05/27/fun-in-chicago/#comment-3950 pat Thu, 29 May 2008 11:20:20 +0000 http://www.thesecondroad.org/bouncing_off_the_bottom/2008/05/27/fun-in-chicago/#comment-3950 Brillant and so refreshing. From all of us in middle age, thank you. Brillant and so refreshing. From all of us in middle age, thank you.

]]> By: melissa http://www.thesecondroad.org/bouncing_off_the_bottom/2008/05/27/fun-in-chicago/#comment-3949 melissa Thu, 29 May 2008 03:10:43 +0000 http://www.thesecondroad.org/bouncing_off_the_bottom/2008/05/27/fun-in-chicago/#comment-3949 Wow. what a powerful and salient article you've written. I do battle with this topic...well, probably daily. As a woman about to turn 43, I am noticing the deepening wrinkles in my hands and face, often in passing-- often as i catch myself in a window or mirror on my way hurrying from or to some dreadfully important place or event. But these moments interrupt the march. They worm their way into my consciousness ever so slightly and then i let them fall away again as i rush onward--out of sadness, fear and self-recrimination. If i could only remember to wear more sunscreen or get some more sleep or eat better, I could ward off the incessant tug of gravity just one more year. Alas, I have fallen victim to the constant drumming of our 'take a pill to fix it' culture: don't grow old, don't grow old, don't grow old. I, who grew up in that age of change and promise and focus on what was truly important in this world, have begun to think about which of the boutique options I might indulge in to 'fix' myself. If i don't, I reason, it is I that will stand out from the conformist crowd and i'm not sure i'm strong or self-confident enough at this stage of life to sink into that comfortably. I hope, Ginnie, that i can be as proud and articulate about my aging when i hit 75 as you are. i like to think i grow to accept the change that happens to me as it comes--that, unbeknownst to me, i become ready for the change foisted upon me. I pray that that progression continues. At this time, the only tools I have to address the situation are prayer and acceptance...and reading more of what you wise women have to say on the subject. Thank you. Wow. what a powerful and salient article you’ve written. I do battle with this topic…well, probably daily. As a woman about to turn 43, I am noticing the deepening wrinkles in my hands and face, often in passing– often as i catch myself in a window or mirror on my way hurrying from or to some dreadfully important place or event. But these moments interrupt the march. They worm their way into my consciousness ever so slightly and then i let them fall away again as i rush onward–out of sadness, fear and self-recrimination. If i could only remember to wear more sunscreen or get some more sleep or eat better, I could ward off the incessant tug of gravity just one more year. Alas, I have fallen victim to the constant drumming of our ‘take a pill to fix it’ culture: don’t grow old, don’t grow old, don’t grow old. I, who grew up in that age of change and promise and focus on what was truly important in this world, have begun to think about which of the boutique options I might indulge in to ‘fix’ myself. If i don’t, I reason, it is I that will stand out from the conformist crowd and i’m not sure i’m strong or self-confident enough at this stage of life to sink into that comfortably. I hope, Ginnie, that i can be as proud and articulate about my aging when i hit 75 as you are. i like to think i grow to accept the change that happens to me as it comes–that, unbeknownst to me, i become ready for the change foisted upon me. I pray that that progression continues. At this time, the only tools I have to address the situation are prayer and acceptance…and reading more of what you wise women have to say on the subject. Thank you.

]]> By: Syd http://www.thesecondroad.org/bouncing_off_the_bottom/2008/05/27/fun-in-chicago/#comment-3948 Syd Wed, 28 May 2008 23:01:31 +0000 http://www.thesecondroad.org/bouncing_off_the_bottom/2008/05/27/fun-in-chicago/#comment-3948 I think that somehow these women have forgotten that aging is a process. Trying to find the fountain of youth through surgery just won't work. I think that there is basically so much focus in the US on beauty that aging women start to feel insecure. I think that somehow these women have forgotten that aging is a process. Trying to find the fountain of youth through surgery just won’t work. I think that there is basically so much focus in the US on beauty that aging women start to feel insecure.

]]> By: Ginnie http://www.thesecondroad.org/bouncing_off_the_bottom/2008/05/27/fun-in-chicago/#comment-3946 Ginnie Wed, 28 May 2008 21:12:18 +0000 http://www.thesecondroad.org/bouncing_off_the_bottom/2008/05/27/fun-in-chicago/#comment-3946 Great article, Martha. I'm not surprised that you got such a good response. On June 17, 2007 I posted a blog entry (Goldendaze) titled "Whose Hand Is This?" with a picture of my 75 year old hand. The last two paragraphs went like this: "And now I am in the quiet phase of my life and I realize how lucky I have been. I have had ups and downs in my long life but I have basically been blessed. I have a loving family and a multitude of friends. Once again I look at my hands and I smile to think how many years it has taken to sculpt them as they are. These are my hands... I have earned them and I marvel that every wrinkle and swollen knuckle is the culmination of those years that I almost forgot." (Once again you and I relate, Martha.) Great article, Martha. I’m not surprised that you got such a good response.
On June 17, 2007 I posted a blog entry (Goldendaze) titled “Whose Hand Is This?” with a picture of my 75 year old hand. The last two paragraphs went like this:
“And now I am in the quiet phase of my life and I realize how lucky I have been. I have had ups and downs in my long life but I have basically been blessed. I have a loving family and a multitude of friends.

Once again I look at my hands and I smile to think how many years it has taken to sculpt them as they are. These are my hands… I have earned them and I marvel that every wrinkle and swollen knuckle is the culmination of those years that I almost forgot.”

(Once again you and I relate, Martha.)

]]> By: Shadow http://www.thesecondroad.org/bouncing_off_the_bottom/2008/05/27/fun-in-chicago/#comment-3942 Shadow Wed, 28 May 2008 07:29:51 +0000 http://www.thesecondroad.org/bouncing_off_the_bottom/2008/05/27/fun-in-chicago/#comment-3942 'sheep in lamb's clothing' is the first thing that popped into my head. and i certainly don't ever want anyone to say that about me. look the best you can, as natural as possible, as suited to your age. being young at heart you can always be, as age is but a number in your spirit. but please, some plastic surgery is blatantly obvious and thus, to me, not enhancing, but detracts from beauty. no-one wants to get old, but we all do, (life is a terminal disease after all), and accepting it gracefully is more beautiful than faking it. interesting subject. ’sheep in lamb’s clothing’ is the first thing that popped into my head. and i certainly don’t ever want anyone to say that about me.

look the best you can, as natural as possible, as suited to your age. being young at heart you can always be, as age is but a number in your spirit. but please, some plastic surgery is blatantly obvious and thus, to me, not enhancing, but detracts from beauty.

no-one wants to get old, but we all do, (life is a terminal disease after all), and accepting it gracefully is more beautiful than faking it. interesting subject.

]]> By: Kathy http://www.thesecondroad.org/bouncing_off_the_bottom/2008/05/27/fun-in-chicago/#comment-3934 Kathy Tue, 27 May 2008 14:54:54 +0000 http://www.thesecondroad.org/bouncing_off_the_bottom/2008/05/27/fun-in-chicago/#comment-3934 I'm about to hit the big 5-0 this week...so I couldn't have read this at a better time. I cannot stand all the plastic faces we see on TV. It's a shame. I am just grateful to be sober right now. How I look is unimportant, though I'm working on the weight thing. I'd love to be thin again and turn a few heads but the fact of the matter is that I was seeking that experience when I did not know who I was. Now that I am gettig to know myself again, age and my looks are outside issues. I’m about to hit the big 5-0 this week…so I couldn’t have read this at a better time. I cannot stand all the plastic faces we see on TV. It’s a shame. I am just grateful to be sober right now. How I look is unimportant, though I’m working on the weight thing. I’d love to be thin again and turn a few heads but the fact of the matter is that I was seeking that experience when I did not know who I was. Now that I am gettig to know myself again, age and my looks are outside issues.

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